coffeebean_news (coffeebean_news) wrote in feelingcriminal,
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First LOCI fanfic

 
Title:       (Undecided: open to suggestions) Chapter One
Pairing: 
Goren/Eames
Rating:   PG (subject to change as story develops)
Disclaimer: 
I don’t own these characters…just playing with ‘em for a bit!
 Also, I have just recently started watching LOCI. By recently I mean within the past three to four months, so I have no idea of what the past history has been between Goren and Eames.  Additional, I may have them interacting in ways that aren’t “true” to their characters. I apologize in advance for any glaringly obvious discrepancies! This is my first attempt at LOCI fanfic. I would greatly appreciate honest critiques in relation to the storyline and I welcome your thoughts as to whether or not I should attempt to continue this storyline. Thanks in advance!
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Detective Goren glanced up from his desk just in time to see his partner enter the room. The look on her face seemed to convey the weight of the world was on her shoulders. She caught him watching and her expression transformed. Her back straightened and a smile replaced the grimace.
“Morning, Goren.”
“What’s up Eames?” Goren maintained eye contact. He wanted Eames to know she had his full attention. The fact that he was easily distracted was well-known. It was just how his brain worked, but his partner was important to him. Giving her his undivided attention spoke his feelings more clearly than he could ever have hoped to put into words.
Alex kept the smile on her face as she studied Bobby. She should have known. No matter how hard she tried, he always knew when something was bothering her. She couldn’t share this. Not yet.
“Oh, just a little tired this morning. Didn’t sleep well last night.” Hurriedly, she changed the subject before he could pose another question. “Any new leads come in overnight?”
There’s you sign, Goren. Back off. “No, nothing new. We need to go over what we’ve got, again. Maybe something new will jump out at us.”
“Ok, good idea.” Eames settled into her chair without removing her jacket. Normally that was the very first thing she did. Remove the jacket then drape it across the back of her chair.
Bobby stored the fact away in his mental filing cabinet, but didn’t comment on her change in behavior. Maybe she was just cold this morning.
They pored over documents until noon. The lack of progress frustrated them both. Eames heaved an impatient sigh while pushing her bangs from her eyes. “This is a dead end, Goren. Let’s break for lunch.”
“Sure,” he readily agreed in hopes she’d confide in him away from the office, “where you wanna go?” He definitely knew something was wrong now. Any time they hit a dead end Eames was the one who wanted to push forward until they found a new clue or, at least, came up with a new theory.
“Um, I…actually, I need to do lunch by myself today.”
“Sure, whatever Eames. I’ll see ya in a hour.”
Bobby studied Alex’s retreating figure. He couldn’t put his finger on it, yet, but his partner was troubled by something. It was more than one night of poor sleep. Well, he would be patient. Eames would talk when she was ready. Besides, trying to get her to open up before she was ready would just be an exercise in futility. Of course, her silence didn’t mean he couldn’t keep a closer eye on her.
Alex left the office without a backward glance. She knew what she would see. Bobby would be watching her with the same intensity with which he scrutinized potential suspects. She bet his head was even cocked to one side.
She stepped into the elevator and moved to the far right side. That was the only move she could make that would take her out of Goren’s line of sight.  Once certain that the doors had securely closed, she allowed herself to relax against the back wall. Breathing deeply she willed her thoughts, and her heart rate, to slow down.
The story she gave Goren about not sleeping well was true. She just hadn’t elaborated as to the reason why she’d been unable to sleep. Alex hated to mislead Bobby, but she didn’t even know for sure what was going on. Last week, while performing her monthly self-breast exam she had discovered a lump. Alex scheduled an appointment with her doctor even though she felt like the lump was most probably benign.
Dr. Mitchell had thoroughly examined the lump and surrounding tissue. Next, she carefully examined the other breast. She had explained to Alex that some women just had what was called ‘fibrous breasts’, which meant their breast tissue was more dense. The extra density did result in the woman feeling a lump, or even several lumps. A woman who had fibrous breasts often felt lumps, in approximately the same location, in both breasts.
With the exam over, Dr. Mitchell instructed Alex to redress and then come to her office. Alex managed to get her bra and shirt back on, though her fingers had been shaking so badly she wondered how she had achieved the feat. Making her way to Dr. Mitchell’s office she knocked lightly and entered. Dr. Mitchell motioned for Alex to take a seat.
“Alex…”
“Dr. Mitchell, before you say anything I just need to…what I’m trying to say is I want you to be completely honest with me. Don’t…,” Alex searched for the right word, “sugar coat…anything.”
Dr. Mitchell wasn’t surprised. Alexandra Eames dealt with hardcore truths everyday. It was part of her job. It was only natural that Alex would want that same level of truth from her doctor. Still, Dr. Mitchell framed her words as thoughtfully as she could.
“Alex, we need to do some additional testing. I explained how some women had fibrous breasts. The lumps which result from that extra dense breast tissue are most often hard, almost like a marble. They are also easily manipulated, meaning you can usually feel them roll under your fingers.” She paused to give Alex time to absorb what she had just explained. From the emotions dancing across Alex’s face, Dr. Mitchell could tell the detective’s analytical mind was making the connections.
 “The lump that I have, Dr. Mitchell, doesn’t fit that description.”
“That’s true. The lump you have is different. First, there’s no corresponding lump in the opposite breast. Second, the lump is stationary. It didn’t move at all even though I applied rather firm pressure. Lastly, the lump isn’t hard. Those three things alone increase the odds of malignancy. Added to that, you have a positive family history for breast cancer.”
Alex nodded her head, “Yes, the family history is why I’ve been so diligent about performing the monthly self-exams.” That was all she could manage to say around the knot that had formed in her throat.
“Alexandra, I know you’ve been diligent. Because of that, if we are indeed dealing with cancer, you’re going to have extremely high odds of beating this. However, let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves. First, we need to schedule a biopsy. We’ll numb the area around the lump. Then, using a very small needle, attached to a syringe, we’ll pull out some to the cells. Those cells will be sent to pathology. The pathologist will examine the cells and tell us exactly what we’re dealing with.”
Several seconds passed before Alex could respond. “Can we do this biopsy early morning? I don’t plan on sharing any of this information with my partner or my captain. At least, not until I’m sure of what I’m dealing with.”
Dr. Mitchell breathed a quiet sigh of relief. For a minute she actually thought Alex was going to refuse to have the biopsy. “Sure, Alex, we can schedule an early morning appointment.”
The biopsy had been performed early this morning. As Dr. Mitchell had promised, the biopsy itself hadn’t really been that big a deal. The numbness had just started wearing off when Alex suggested she and Goren take a lunch break.  She did have prescription pain pills, but she didn’t dare take one while on the job. Instead she popped a couple of ibuprofen once she had gotten into her car.
Alex pulled into a parking space and turned off the engine. A quick glance in the review mirror revealed faint smudges under her eyes with deeper lines around the outer corners. No wonder Goren had been staring at her so intently. A total stranger would have been able to tell something was bothering her. 
She knew she could have talked to Bobby. She could have said, “I can’t go to lunch with you today because that’s when I’ll be finding out whether or not I have cancer.” Alex had no idea what reaction she would have gotten from him, but one thing she knew for sure. Detective Robert Goren would have insisted on coming to this appointment with her.
Alex smiled at the thought. Goren was loyal and he knew how to empathize. But, for now, this was her battle. She had absolutely no idea how she’d react if she heard Dr. Mitchell say the pathologist had found cancer cells. If she was going to fall apart she had rather not have any witnesses.
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